Keeping It In
by EGB Fan
Summary: All Grown Up: Dil delivers some news that Didi just can't humour him in.
1. News

**Disclaimer: **_All Grown Up _(c) Klasky-Csupo

_All Grown Up: _**Keeping It In**

Part1 

Dil Pickles was sitting alone in the Java Lava Internet café with his chin in his hand, swirling a straw around a chocolate milkshake that he just didn't feel like drinking. He was aware of eyes on him from time to time, though by this time he didn't care whose eyes they were. Chaz Finster and Betty Deville were both there (hardly surprising as they owned the café), and they were bound to be concerned because they were good friends with Dil's parents. Their sons, Chuckie Finster and Phil Deville, were somewhere around as well. It was Chuckie who eventually came over and sat down opposite Dil, assuming a look of kindly concern behind his thick glasses and stray strands of vivid red hair.

"What's the matter, Dil?" Chuckie asked in distinctly nasal tones. "You've been playing with that milkshake for like a half-hour."

"You wouldn't understand, C," Dil sighed sadly, his eyes downcast and hidden behind the false teeth trailing from his red-and-blue-striped hat.

"Try me," invited Chuckie. "C'mon Dil, you're my best friend's little brother. I'm not just gonna leave you here looking like your dog died."

Dil sighed resignedly and then lifted his head slowly to look at Chuckie. "I've suspected something for a few days now," he confided. "And now the very sight of this milkshake is making me feel sick. You know what I _really_ crave right now?"

"What?" Chuckie asked obligingly.

"A diced banana floating in fresh orange juice with a light seasoning of salt."

Chuckie just looked at him, somewhat taken aback even though he knew that he should be used to this kind of thing from Dil by now.

"Chuckie, don't you see?" Dil asked desperately, spreading his hands in an elaborate gesture. "I think I'm pregnant!"

Chuckie was two years older than Dil, and had known him since the day he was born. He'd heard almost everything from the eccentric young boy, but this was a new one on him. He took a few moments to let the news sink in, and then he decided to try and reassure Dil by pointing out the obvious flaws in his assumption: "Dil, you're a nine-year-old boy. You can't get pregnant. I think Tommy's doing sex ed in school – go home and ask him and I'm sure he'll tell you all about it."

"Chuckie, you're so naïve," Dil smiled slightly, shaking his head in a parent-like manner. "Do they teach you about alien reproduction in sex ed?"

"Oh, aliens," Chuckie nodded, finally understanding. "Well… uh… congratulations, I guess. Who's the father? Izzy?"

"Izzy?" Dil seemed to cheer up at last, laughing freely at the very notion that his imaginary alien friend could be responsible for this. "Chuck, as much as I love Izzy, he _is_ imaginary. He couldn't get me pregnant even he _wanted _to, which he wouldn't, because I'm like a mother to him. Ah man!" His face suddenly clouded over with concern. "I hope he doesn't get too jealous when the babies arrive."

"Bab_ies_?" Chuckie asked tentatively. "As in more than one?"

"I'd say I'm packing about a dozen."

Chuckie blinked. "Oh. Right. So… um… how do you feel?"

"It's hard to say," sighed Dil, dropping his eyes again slightly. "I'm proud that I was chosen, natch. And I already love these little guys – I can feel them growing inside of me! But… how am I gonna tell my parents?"

"Well… I'm sure they'll understand," Chuckie said carefully, the subtext of this advice being that Didi and Stu Pickles wouldn't believe for a moment that their younger son was incubating a dozen alien embryos, but they'd probably humour him like they usually did.

x x x

Dil swallowed his last mouthful of meatloaf and then raised his head to look at his parents, taking a deep breath and regarding each of them in turn. "Mom," he began boldly. "Dad." He then looked at his ten-year-old brother Tommy and added soberly, "T. I have some news. Now I know you'll be shocked at first, but when you've had time to come around to the idea I hope you'll be happy for me."

Stu, Didi and Tommy Pickles all looked expectantly at their young relative, utterly clueless as to what this seemingly important news might be.

"I'm pregnant."

They all just stared at him from a few moments, wondering what to say to this. Finally Tommy gave a response: "Hey, that's great news, D. Congrats, y'know?"

"Who's the father?" Stu asked cautiously.

"I don't think you'd know him," replied Dil. "Dad, don't get mad, but the father isn't really around anymore. He had to go back to his home planet indefinitely on urgent business. But it's ok. If he doesn't come back I'm just gonna have to raise the babies on my own."

"That's… great, honey," Didi smiled weakly, rising to her feet and hurriedly gathering up plates. "Stu, may I have a word with you in the living room?"

Dil watched, perplexed, as his parents hastily retreated into the next room. He then looked at Tommy and asked, "What's their problem, T? Mom and Dad are normally cool about all my alien communications. I hoped they'd be psyched for me."

"Well… this one _is_ a little different, bro," Tommy pointed out.

"Right," Dil nodded, his expression suddenly clearing. "Gotcha."

"Uh… really?"

"Sure. They're just freaked out that they're gonna become grandparents. I mean that's understandable – you and I aren't exactly of an age to be planning families. But once they get used to the idea they'll be as excited as I am!"

"You're excited, huh?" asked Tommy.

"Totally," Dil smiled happily. "And so should you be. You're gonna be an uncle, T."

"To an alien. That'll be weird."

"Aliens. And believe me, you'll love them just as much as if they were human."

"Right." Tommy cut a sideways glance at the living room doorway, from where he could hear his parents' voices hissing furtively at each other. "Um… D… it's swell that you're gonna be a mom and all, but maybe you should tone it down a little around the parents. I mean they're cool with most of your… stuff… but when you start saying you've got baby aliens inside of you…" he tailed off.

"Hey, I had to tell them sometime," shrugged Dil. "It's not exactly the kind of thing you can keep a secret forever, right?"

"Uh… right."

"What do you think they're talking about in there?"

"I don't know," Tommy said darkly, though he thought he could take a pretty good guess. "Maybe I should go find out. But you stay here, ok? They might be… planning your baby shower."

"It doesn't sound like they're planning a baby shower to me," remarked Dil, his brow furrowing with concern. "You don't think they'd try to make me get rid of them, do you?"

"That… um… has to be your decision, Dil."

"You're right, Tommy," Dil nodded solemnly. "That's what I'll tell them."

Tommy smiled weakly at his brother and then followed his parents into the living room. Stu and Didi were still hissing and squeaking at each other, obviously wanting to shout but mindful of being overheard. They stopped abruptly when they saw their older son walking into the room.

"Guys, c'mon," Tommy began reasonably. "It's harmless."

"But he actually _believes_ it, Tommy," Didi said quietly. "UFOs and flashing lights are all very well, but now it's getting out of hand."

"It's not hurting anybody," retorted Tommy. "And it makes him happy. Mom." He looked imploringly at Didi. "Wasn't it only last year you told Vice Principal Pangborn where to go when he wanted Dil to get counselling?"

"Yes honey, but I didn't realise then how bad it was," explained Didi. "You must have noticed that it's getting beyond a few slight eccentricities. One of these days it might _stop _being harmless. Dil thinks there's something inside him now. What if he decides next that he has to cut himself open?"

"Oh, what if," muttered Tommy, rolling his eyes. "Ok, so what are you gonna do?"

"We're just going to have someone talk to him to start with," Didi explained patronisingly. "We don't know what will happen after that."

"Well whatever it is I know Dil's not gonna like it," retorted Tommy. "I expected more from you." He looked at his father and added, "_Both_ of you."

x x x

With the burden of having to tell his parents no longer on his shoulders, the news of Dil's pregnancy travelled fast. Betty Deville listened from the service counter at the Java Lava on Saturday morning as Dil discussed the news with Phil, Chuckie's stepsister Kimi Finster and their friend Susie Carmichael.

"I'm really happy for you, Dil," smiled Kimi, a pretty and colourfully dressed Japanese girl of eleven years. "So when's it due?"

"There's more than one," Dil told her patiently. "And I don't know. Nobody bothered to tell me how long my gestation period would be."

"Aliens, huh?" remarked Susie, a twelve-year-old black girl with mini-braids tied up in a red bandana. "The least he could have done would be to tell you what to expect."

"So like… where are they coming out of?" asked Phil, really wanting to believe that this was true even though he couldn't quite do it.

"I'm thinking my mouth," Dil replied casually, not noticing the arrival of his parents and brother to the café. "But hey, maybe they'll surprise me."

"So are you experiencing any symptoms yet?" Betty asked loudly, as she carried over a bowl of banana slices floating in fresh orange juice. Didi had always asked her friends to indulge Dil in his little fantasies. "Just you wait for the varicose veins. They're a nightmare, particularly when you're carrying twins."

"Twins?" echoed Dil, sprinkling a small amount of salt over his banana and orange juice. "I'm expecting dectuplets at the very least."

Betty smiled and shook her head fondly as she retrieved three empty sundae glasses and turned to make her way back to the counter. When she got there she was suddenly accosted by Didi, who spread her arms in an elaborate gesture of despair and squeaked frenziedly, "Betty, what are you _doing_?"

"I'm just humouring the pup, Deed," Betty replied defensively. "Isn't that how you parent?"

"Until recently," Tommy intoned darkly. "What you guys are doing is wrong."

"It's just a consultation, Tommy," Stu said brightly. "It might not even change anything."

"Well, _hopefully _it'll stop him thinking he's got aliens inside of him," muttered Didi. Then she strode towards the table where the kids were sitting and called, "Dil!"

"Mom. Hey. 'Sup?" Dil smiled pleasantly at her.

"I can't watch this," mumbled Tommy, going over to the counter where Chuckie was wiping down the surface and Betty's daughter Lil was replenishing the ice-cream machine.

"What's going on?" Chuckie asked anxiously, catching sight of Tommy's mutinous expression.

"They're taking Dil to a shrink."

"And that's bad?" asked Lil.

"Hey," Tommy shot at her. "My brother may be a little weird but he's harmless, and I don't see any good reason to try and change him."

"But isn't this pregnancy thing a little… OTT?" Lil asked timidly.

Tommy sighed and said, "Maybe, but I don't remember him ever being this happy."

"Where are you taking me?" Dil asked anxiously, as Didi led him towards the exit and gestured for Stu to follow. "You're not trying to make me get rid of them, are you?"

"Not exactly," Didi replied cautiously. "But we _are_ going to a very special kind of doctor."

"A gynaecologist?" Dil asked hopefully, brightening a little.

"No-o… it's just someone I want you to talk to," said Didi. "See you later, Tommy."

Tommy didn't answer.

x x x

Dr. Cahill was a sober looking man approaching middle-age whose smart suit drastically contrasted Dil's eccentric getup: red sneakers, purple cargo shorts and a green t-shirt and sky-blue sweater under a brown and mustard-yellow woollen vest. Stu thought he detected a slight flicker of doubt… or _something_… in the doctor's face as Dil approached him.

Backwards.

Which probably didn't help.

"Hey Deed," Stu murmured furtively. "Are you sure this is such a good idea?"

"He's just going to talk to him, Stu," his wife pointed out.

"Right," Stu nodded. "So after they've talked, then what happens?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

"Dylan Pickles, I presume," Dr. Cahill smiled politely, as Dil drew to a halt beside him.

"Got it in one, doc," Dil smiled languidly.

"So how are you feeling today?"

"Ah well, y'know, the cravings are just _insane _but I've been watching what I eat and it feels to me like these little guys are getting along just fine down there." He placed a hand protectively over his abdomen. "No morning sickness or dizzy spells yet. That can't be bad, right?"

"Dil," Didi hissed furtively, apparently hoping that her voice would reach her son's ears whilst somehow missing the doctor's. "He is not a gynaecologist!"

"Why… would… you think I was gynaecologist?" Dr. Cahill asked guardedly.

"I'm pregnant," Dil told him happily. "Isn't that why we're here?"

"Well… in a way I suppose it is," Dr. Cahill replied patronisingly, his expression telling the boy's parents that Dil Pickles was more than he had ever expected from this profession. "Perhaps you'd better take a seat and – um – tell me all about it."

x x x

Tommy was lying back on his bed, holding his video camera up in front of his face and staring at the lens.

"Filmmaker's block is such a curse," he sighed despairingly.

"You _do _seem to get it a lot," Chuckie remarked from his position by the window.

"Is anything interesting going on out there, C?"

"Not really. But it's a nice day. You wanna go skating or cycling or something?"

"Can't," Tommy replied shortly. "I wanna wait for Mom and Dad and Dil. I'm really worried about him. What if the doctor thinks he's crazy or something?"

"_Everyone_ thinks Dil's crazy," Chuckie pointed out. "But that's never bothered any of us before."

"So why now?" wondered Tommy. "Why is my mom suddenly freaking out about it _now_?"

"Maybe now that he's almost ten she thinks it's not cute anymore," shrugged Chuckie. "Or maybe she really _is_ worried that he's gonna cut holes in himself or whatever it was she said."

"Dil doesn't seem the type to go in for self-harming. He's too happy."

"Well why don't you stop worrying until he comes home, huh?"

As if on cue, they heard the familiar sound of Stu's car engine outside and a moment later the front door clicked open and shut. Tommy sat up abruptly and held his breath, hoping that his brother would come and tell him about the appointment. Sure enough, after a few moments Dil came traipsing into the room wearing a downcast expression and threw himself onto the foot of Tommy's bed, spinning round and falling back so that his head was suspended about an inch above the floor.

"You look worse than when you were worrying about telling your parents you were pregnant," remarked Chuckie.

"Dil, what's wrong?" Tommy asked anxiously.

"That psychiatrist thinks I'm crazy," replied Dil.

"Oh. Well, do you really care what he thinks?" Tommy asked kindly.

"No," shrugged Dil. "But he gave me some pills."

"Pills?" Tommy asked sharply. "What kinda pills?"

"I don't know. He just said they were gonna 'calm me down'. Mom says I have to take them but I'm worried – it says you shouldn't take them when you're pregnant."

Tommy and Chuckie exchanged glances.

"Well… that probably just means Earth pregnancies," Chuckie tried to reassure Dil. "Maybe it's safe for someone who's incubating alien life forms."

"Maybe," shrugged Dil. "Maybe not."

"Don't take 'em," Tommy blurted out.

"What?" Dil raised his head sharply to look at his brother.

"Don't take them," Tommy repeated. "You shouldn't be forced to put anything into your body that you don't want to."

"Huh," muttered Dil. "Tell that to Mom."

"She's not gonna force them down your throat, is she?"

"She just said I have to give them a chance."

"Maybe they won't be so bad," Chuckie intervened. "How about we just go and take a look at these pills?"

"I suppose looking at them can't hurt," reasoned Tommy, dropping his feet to the floor and standing up. "What else did the doctor say, Dil?"

"Not much. I did most of the talking."

"Hence the pills," Chuckie muttered under his breath, as he followed the brothers from the room.

Two minutes later Tommy was standing in the kitchen with both of his parents, Chuckie and Dil and reading from the side of a medium-sized white pill bottle.

"It sounds like these are gonna do Dil more harm than good," he remarked. "There are an awful lot of possible side-effects: dizziness, nausea, blurred vision, shaking… _'Do not operate heavy machinery while on this medication'_."

"That's ok, T," Dil sighed resignedly. "I wasn't planning to operate any heavy machinery while I was pregnant anyway."

"Dil, do you really _believe _that you're pregnant?" Didi asked sharply.

"Totally," replied Dil. "Mom, I _am_ pregnant."

"Right. Well maybe you'd better start on those pills with dinner."

x x x

Dil spent the remainder of the evening in a most uncharacteristic state of docile detachment, which alarmed Tommy so much that he felt compelled to ask after the babies. At this Dil produced a small smile and said quietly, "They're all right."

The next day was Sunday, and Dil's behaviour was much the same as it had been the previous evening: he was quiet and didn't betray any kind of emotion. In the afternoon Stu's older brother Drew called to enquire after his nephew, and Tommy managed to overhear Didi's side of the conversation.

"I really think the pills are working already," she told her brother-in-law happily. "He hasn't mentioned aliens all day."

Though Didi evidently considered this good news, Tommy knew that it wasn't like Dil and he found it somewhat alarming. After a short search he found his brother quietly flipping through a comic book, so Tommy approached Dil and asked cautiously, "Are they still there?"

"What?" Dil asked disinterestedly.

"The aliens," replied Tommy. "Are you still pregnant?" _How weird did that sound?_

"Of course."

"Oh. Good."

x x x

On Monday morning Tommy was woken by the sound of retching coming from the bathroom. He hurried out onto the landing in time to meet Dil, who was still in his pyjamas and looked sick and pale.

"Is it the pills?" asked Tommy, following his brother into his room.

"I think it must be," croaked Dil, throwing himself onto his bed and grimacing as he held himself around his stomach, obviously still feeling the effects of his trip to the bathroom.

"Too bad, bro," Tommy sympathised. "I really thought you'd lucked out with the side-effects."

"T…" Dil whispered hoarsely, his eyes suddenly brimming with tears. "They're all gone."

"What?" Tommy asked urgently, a stab of panic coursing sharply through his entire body. He didn't doubt that the aliens inhabiting his brother's stomach were imaginary, but to Dil…

"My babies. I just had to flush 'em all down the u-bend."

"Ah Dil…"

"Can you please tell Mom and Dad that I'm sick and I can't go to school today?"

"Of course." Tommy approached Dil, desperately seeking some way to try and comfort him. "Are you gonna be ok?"

"I just want to be left alone."

"Oh. Ok." Tommy backed slowly out of the room, the sight of his brother lying gloomily on his bed with tears in his eyes gradually shrinking, but the image was sure to haunt him all day. "But I'm here if you need me, ok?"

"T, you're going to school," Dil pointed out patiently.

"Well… after school, then. Do you want me to tell Mom and Dad they're… gone?"

"That's ok," Dil smiled weakly. "I'll do it."

x x x

Tommy was accosted by Vice Principal Pangborn by his locker at recess.

"So your brother's sick today, huh?" Pangborn asked sharply.

"Yeah," Tommy replied nervously, instinctively shrinking away from the uncommonly large man.

"So is he _sick_ sick or…" Pangborn glanced furtively to each side and then moved his face uncomfortably close to Tommy's, whispering in conspiratorial tones, "_another _kind of sick?"

"He threw up this morning," offered Tommy.

"Threw up, did he? Hmph! Look Pickles, you can tell me. I've heard rumour that Dil has been receiving treatment for… psychological reasons."

"_What_?" exclaimed Tommy. "Who told you that?"

"Don't take that tone with me, Pickles," snapped Pangborn.

"I'm sorry sir, but I didn't realise we were telling people about that yet. I think Dil wants it kept confidential."

"Well I'm not really 'people', Pickles, am I?" bristled Pangborn. "That certificate of early developmental child psychology is still on my wall, you know. If your parents ever decide that they'd like me to try again with him…"

"Thanks," Tommy smiled weakly. "Can I go now?"

"If you must. Hey, Pickles!" barked Pangborn, just when Tommy thought he had escaped. "If you want this kept a secret, you'd better have a word with your cousin."

x x x

"It just slipped out," shrugged Angelica Pickles, deliberately focusing intently on her newly painted nails.

"Are you even sorry?" demanded Tommy, forcibly slamming shut Angelica's locker to remove the distraction of the mirror inside the door.

"Why should I be?" asked Angelica. "It's only Pangborn."

"Oh yeah? Anyone else?"

"Well… I may have mentioned something to Savannah."

"Angelica!" shrieked Tommy, mortified.

"Whoa, hey, don't freak," said Angelica, holding up both hands in a calming gesture. "Ok, I _am_ sorry, but having a cousin who's on brain medication makes me seem more interesting to the A-crowd."

"Is that all you care about?" Tommy asked scathingly. "Dil's your flesh and blood."

Angelica let out a deep sigh of resignation and asked, "So how is he?"

"Not good," Tommy answered gravely. "He thinks he lost the babies."

"What _babies_?"

"The alien babies."

"Oh," remarked Angelica. "No wonder they medicated him."

"He's really upset," Tommy snapped angrily. "Susie and Kimi are coming to see him after school before Kimi's shift at the Java Lava. Do you wanna come too?"

"I suppose I might as well," shrugged Angelica, not betraying any concern that she may have felt for her young cousin's feelings. "Like you say, he _is_ a relative. I'll take him some flowers and a condolence card."

"You'd better not make a joke of this," warned Tommy.

"Jeez, don't be so uptight. I'll be nice, ok?"

"Just make sure you are."

x x x

"Dil?" Tommy rapped gently on Dil's bedroom door. "Susie and Kimi and Angelica are here to see you. Is it ok if we come in?"

"T," a sad voice came from the other side of the door. "Ladies. If any of you think that you can help to fill the void in my heart, then please come in and try."

"Poor Dil," murmured Kimi, as she followed Tommy into the darkened room.

"Is it ok if we turn on a light?" Tommy ventured timidly.

"Knock yourself out," shrugged Dil.

Tommy flicked the switch on the wall and the room was instantly flooded with light. It was discouraging to see that Dil was still wearing his pyjamas. It was more discouraging still to see a continual jerking movement of his right hand, which he held close to his head as he lay back on the bed, his feet on the pillows.

"Dil, you're shaking," Tommy pointed out. "Is that another side-effect of the pills?"

"Could be," Dil returned expressionlessly. "Or it could be a physical manifestation of the emotional pain caused by miscarriage."

Kimi didn't believe in aliens, but she desperately wanted to cheer Dil up so she asked, "Are you absolutely sure they're _all gone_?"

Dil suddenly looked thoughtful. "I think so," he replied. "To be honest, when I barfed it was hard to tell what was alien and what was diced carrot, but I just don't feel them inside of me anymore. I can't believe that Mom of all people would do this to me," he sighed. "_She_ _knows_ what it is to nurture a brand new little life inside of you and feel it grow. She never wanted me to have those babies, though. Do you guys suppose she did this on purpose?"

"No!" exclaimed Tommy, knowing perfectly well that his mother wouldn't go to the trouble of concocting an intricate plan to dispose of a dozen-odd aliens that she didn't believe existed. "Dil, how could she have known this would happen? Besides, it was that doctor who prescribed those pills."

"You're right," agreed Dil, his eyes narrowing malevolently. "If he was a doctor at all! Maybe he was an alien from a hostile race sent deliberately to sabotage the birth of my babies. Ah man, I'm so _stupid_! Why did I tell him everything?"

"Doctors have a way of making you trust them," Susie said gently.

"I thought I could spot an alien a mile off," Dil sighed sadly. "It must have been the pregnancy throwing me off whack."

"Don't you feel _any better_?" Angelica suddenly asked.

"Not a bit, cuz," replied Dil. "I daresay I'll get over it eventually, but the loss of twelve or so babies is tough to deal."

"I'll bet," muttered Angelica. Then she said more loudly, "I have to go. Feel better twerp, ok?"

"Angelica, wait!" called Susie, following her friend out onto the landing. "Are you just gonna leave him like that?"

"Tommy and Kimi can take care of him," Angelica returned shortly. "I'm not very good at comforting people. What I _am_ good at is giving them a piece of my mind."

"Who?" Susie asked cautiously. "Not Stu and Didi…"

"Stu and Didi deserve everything they get," spat Angelica. "They've never exactly been model parents, have they? Do you remember when we were little and our parents were dumb enough to let them look after us? Those dumb babies used to run amok all over town or the hospital or the ice rink or wherever – and so did we, come to that – and then by some miracle we'd always find our way back and Stu and Didi didn't even realise we'd been gone!"

"Oh yeah, I _do_ remember that," Susie nodded slowly. "The worst one was when they stranded us on that desert island and we wandered into the rainforest. By rights that should have killed us."

"Exactly. So if their son is a little bit crazy they've got nobody but themselves to blame, but now they decide they don't like it so they start pumping him with drugs! That is way cheese!"

"Y'know, Dil was blaming Didi more than Stu," Susie pointed out.

"Stu could have stopped it if he wanted to," retorted Angelica.

"Are you sure you wanna go have it out with them?"

"Absolutely!"

"Ok then," Susie smiled encouragingly. "You go, girlfriend!"

x x x

"Dad wants a progress report," Angelica said coldly to her aunt and uncle. "I'll save you the trouble of calling, shall I?"

"Um… thank you, Angelica," Didi answered warily, recognising the dangerous edge to the aggressive young blonde's voice.

"No problem," Angelica deadpanned. "I'll tell him you forced Dil to take some medication that he believes resulted in the death of his children, and consequently he's been lying in the dark all day."

"He has?" Stu asked anxiously. "All day?"

"Didn't either of you even check on him?" demanded Angelica.

"He… he said he wanted to be left alone," stammered Stu.

"And besides, he didn't lose _anything_," added Didi. "There were never any aliens."

"Maybe not," snarled Angelica, her voice dangerously low. "But to Dil they were as real as he and Tommy are to you. Imagine how you'd feel if someone took them away from you, Didi. Of course," she added slowly, "if you carry on like this, you might just drive at least one of them away all by yourself."

x x x

Dil felt hollow. The void inside him felt as big and as black as the sky at which he was staring – worse even, for the sky at least had stars. The grass of the back garden was damp on his back and legs, but he didn't feel the cold from it. Behind him the house slept: Stu, Didi, Tommy and the two dogs slumbered peacefully, unaware that Dil was just outside feeling more awake than ever.

"I'm sorry, little alien dudes," he whispered, his eyes filling with tears. "They're dead and it's all my fault. I shouldn't have taken those pills – I never even wanted to! I know this doesn't make what I did any better, but I miss them like crazy. I don't even know if you can hear me, but if you can, _please_ won't you give me just one more chance? I won't blow it this time, I promise!"

The night remained dark and silent. Dil let out a deep sigh and lifted his arms to rest his head on his hands, gazing up at the stars and wondering if he would ever get close to them again.

_To be continued…_


	2. Signs

_All Grown Up: _**Keeping It In**

Part 2 

He had never intended to fall asleep out there, but it was a warm and pleasant night and he had been surrounded by the soothing white noise of the backyard, so Dil supposed it wasn't that surprising. At first he assumed the brilliant light forcing his eyes to remain shut must be the morning sun, but then he thought he recognised it as something else.

"Dil?" a voice asked tentatively.

"Yeah, it's me," Dil replied without hesitation. "I never thought you'd contact me again after what I did. So what's the haps?"

"It wasn't your fault, Dil."

"Sure it was. I should never have taken those pills."

"You're only a child. It was a lot of responsibility for you. But listen," the voice crooned in soothing tones. "They're not all dead."

"They're not?" Dil asked sharply.

"There's one left."

Dil was overjoyed to hear this. He felt his face break into a smile of grateful relief.

"But it's weak," the voice added. "Those pills have put it in danger."

"Can I save it?"

"I think so. But on no account must you take any more of those pills."

"Well duh."

"I'm trying to help you here," the voice bristled. "Look after yourself, eat well, and your baby should live."

"Thanks, alien dude," Dil smiled serenely, his mind growing peaceful as he started to feel the morning dew on his back and the sun on his face and his baby moving against the wall of his stomach. "I won't screw up again, I promise."

"Dil?"

He recognised _that_ voice straightaway, and Dil started to rise into a sitting position. However the cloudless sky suddenly started to swim in front of his eyes. He abruptly lay back down and clutched his hand to his forehead as he felt a stabbing pain there.

"Dil!" Tommy called again, going to kneel down next to his brother. "Are you ok?"

"I feel a little dizzy," answered Dil. "It's probably those bogus pills again."

"What are you doing in the yard?"

"I came out here in the night to think. I guess I must have fallen asleep."

"Dil, you idiot. Can you get up?"

Dil propped himself up on his elbows, and then rose experimentally a little higher. He still felt dizzy, but he found that he could now manoeuvre himself into a sitting position. Then he suddenly remembered the advice he had received moments before.

"Food!" he exclaimed. "I need food!"

"Uh… ok," Tommy agreed, surprised by the urgency in Dil's voice. "C'mon – I'll help you inside."

"Thanks, T."

As Dil leant on Tommy's arm and walked tentatively towards the house, he was quietly wondering whom he should and shouldn't tell about his surviving baby.

x x x

Dil continued to feel unwell for most of the day, but as he had managed to avoid taking his pills that morning he put it down to the pregnancy. All through his science lesson he wondered how he was going to persuade his parents – particularly his mother – to let him stop taking the medication altogether. He supposed that the side effects had hit him pretty badly, and if he didn't tell anyone that one of his babies had survived they might agree that the pills were doing more harm than good.

He was eager for lunchtime to come around – that little alien still needed feeding up. When twelve o'clock came Dil hurried to the cafeteria and loaded his tray. He was the first to sit down, and was joined minutes later by Tommy, Phil, Lil and Chuckie.

"You got enough to eat there, D?" Tommy asked jovially.

"I hope so," Dil murmured evasively, still not sure whether he should keep his one surviving baby a _total_ secret.

"Are you feeling better?" Chuckie enquired politely. "Tommy said you had a bit of a funny turn this morning."

"I'm fine," lied Dil, who wasn't feeling in the least bit fine. There was a nagging pain in his stomach that was exacerbated every time he swallowed a mouthful of food, but he kept it up for the baby's sake. He was also feeling dizzy again, and it was worse than it had been that morning. As he continued to force down his lunch, the room started to swim before his eyes. The conversation around him seemed to grow louder and yet the words were lost to him, until suddenly he felt his whole body give way.

"Oh my God – DIL!" screamed a voice: Kimi's. She was sitting two tables away with Susie and her friend Z, but she saw it all quite clearly.

Z, a slightly alarming looking youth with green hair and an earring, adopted a steely expression of determination and launched himself dramatically over the table separating him from Dil. People were rapidly flocking around the nine-year-old boy who lay unconscious on the less than pristine cafeteria floor. Kimi and Susie quickly followed Z, and Angelica materialised from another part of the room.

"What the hell happened?" she demanded loudly.

"I don't know!" Tommy cried in panic. "He just keeled over!"

"Ok, don't freak," Z drawled in lazy, confident tones. "Step back and give the little dude room to breathe."

"_Is_ he breathing?" Lil squeaked nervously.

Z stepped forward on heavy black combat boots and squatted down beside Dil, placing a hand about an inch in front of his mouth.

"No sweat," Z announced coolly. "He's breathing. So like, maybe one of you guys should call an ambulance or something."

Lil was about to volunteer to go out to the payphone in the hall, but then Angelica whipped out her cell phone. She dialled, put the phone to her ear, waited a few moments and then barked urgently, "We need an ambulance over here _now_! My cousin's collapsed…"

Her voice was suddenly drowned out as Pangborn marched across the room, demanding loudly, "What's going on over here?"

"Something's wrong with Dil!" Tommy panicked, still hovering over his brother's unconscious form.

"I think he's just fainted," Z put in. "But his cuz called an ambulance – you know – just in case."

"Good thinking, Pickles," Pangborn nodded approvingly at Angelica as she slipped her cell phone back into her pocket. "All right the rest of you – back to whatever you were doing!"

He glared around at the large gathering of students, most of whom meekly returned to their lunches. Dil's friends continued to hover near him, Tommy still quietly panicking until a thought suddenly struck him.

"Angelica!" he shouted to his cousin. "Can you call my mom?"

Angelica produced her cell phone again just as the ambulance siren caught her ears from perhaps three or four streets away. She sighed with relief, grateful at least to be able to tell Didi that her son would soon be at the hospital.

x x x

"WAH!"

When Dil woke up in a hospital bed, it took him a moment to realise that he was looking at the alarming yet harmless visage of Charlotte Pickles' terrible facelift.

"Oh, Aunt Charlotte, it's you," he sighed with relief. "Where am I?"

"DIL!" a familiar voice shrieked, and before he knew what was happening he was in his mother's crushing arms. "Thank God you're awake! Are you ok? How are you feeling? Oh honey, can you ever forgive me?"

"I feel fine," Dil answered bemusedly. "Forgive you for what?"

"They think it was a reaction to those pills," said someone that sounded like Angelica. "But they said they're not sure until they do some tests or someth'n' – I dunno."

"Tests?" echoed Dil, his hand instinctively moving down to his stomach. "What kind of tests?"

When Didi moved away slightly Dil was able to see that he was in a hospital ward containing several beds, and that the space around his bed was occupied by pretty much his entire family: Stu, Didi, Tommy, Drew, Charlotte, Angelica and his grandfather Lou Pickles all stood over him.

"Don't you trust these people, scout!" Lou exclaimed. "They'll open you up and poke around inside you and take pictures of your brain and then they'll charge you forty dollars to tell you there was never anything the matter with you in the first place!"

"But there _was_ something the matter with him, Grandpa," argued Tommy. Then he looked at his brother and said, "Dil, you keeled over in the middle of lunch. You scared the life out of me!"

"Whoa. Weird," remarked Dil. "I _was_ feeling a little freaky. So what kind of tests?" he asked again.

"They just want to look at you," Stu explained soothingly. "They won't cut you open or anything. Not unless they have to."

"Might they have to?"

"I shouldn't think so."

"Wow." Dil leaned back on the hard hospital pillows, his mind instantly filled with possible scenarios in which anyone might want to harm him or his baby alien.

"So how do you feel?" asked Tommy.

"Ok," shrugged Dil, telling the truth this time.

"They want to keep you in for observation," Didi told him. "It's nothing to worry about, but I'm going to stay with you, ok?"

"Ok," Dil said again. "If that's what you want."

"I really am sorry, honey," added Didi.

"It's cool," Dil smiled at her. "I mean those pills sucked big time, but like you were only doing what you thought was best for me or somethin', right?"

"Exactly," his mother agreed, visibly relaxing with relief.

"Solid," Dil nodded approvingly.

x x x

The children's ward provided a playroom generously equipped with donated old books and toys and a much fought-over sandpit. Didi suggested to Dil that he might like to spend some time there while they waited for these mysterious test results and he obliged, the only realistic alternative being to lie in bed and send his mother out to buy him magazines.

Inevitably Didi went to buy magazines anyway. Dil, wrist-deep in month-old clammy sand, watched her go through a small window in the wall separating them. The other kids didn't seem to mind letting Dil play with their precious sand. Some of them watched him with interest, one boy of about six visibly impressed by his small sculpture of a bug-eyed alien. As the minutes wore on, Dil began to feel increasingly uncomfortable as he became aware of more and more eyes on him.

"What's the matter with you?" a blond girl of about Dil's own age suddenly asked, her eyes flashing with something that Dil couldn't quite name, but he thought he could attribute it to Angelica. "Are you here because you're crazy?"

"Indirectly," Dil replied evenly. "I had a bad reaction to my brain medicine."

"_Brain_ medicine?" the girl echoed, horrified.

"There's nothing wrong with being a little bit different, you know," Dil mumbled, half to himself, wiping the sand from his hands on the front of his hospital gown.

"I _knew_ you were a freak," the girl muttered, just audibly.

Dil glowered at her and then stalked out of the playroom. He didn't feel safe in that place. He was extremely anxious of the possibility that malevolent forces might be out there somewhere trying to damage his one surviving baby, and it was alarming to think of all the things aliens might be able do with so much sophisticated electronic equipment dotted around the place.

A small boy in one of the beds suddenly projectile vomited onto the girl opposite him, and with the flurry of activity this caused amongst the staff Dil was able to sneak out of the ward. He found his way onto the roof, thinking immediately of the hospital dramas he had seen in which troubled patients ended up in such a position and had to be talked back inside by the most handsome doctor.

Needless to say, suicide was the last thing on Dil's mind. He just wanted answers. He still felt that his baby was alive, but he wanted to know whether it was healthy and likely to survive until the time came for him to give birth. He wanted to know _when_ that would be, and he wanted to know what would become of the infant alien afterwards. He thought of that malicious little girl in the playroom, and about how people like her made it difficult for people like him – people who were in any way _different_ – to get on with their lives. A baby alien was sure not to fit in with other kids. Obviously. Dil didn't even know how he was supposed to take proper care of the baby when it arrived.

It was already getting dark and a half moon shone dimly through the clouds. Dil watched his breath spiralling towards the horizon, murmuring quietly to the vast grey sky, "Maybe it's just as well that I've only got one baby to worry about now."

"Hey."

Dil turned and saw a smiling dark-haired nurse standing by the door.

"We were wondering where you'd gotten to," she said. "Your mother's worried. And your tests results have come through."

"Cool," Dil smiled approvingly. "Am I gonna make it?"

"I think so," the nurse laughed. "Come on. I'm Liana, by the way."

"I'm Dil."

"I _know_ who you are." She put an arm around him as she led him down into the main building. "So how are you feeling?"

"Ok."

"Something on your mind?"

"Not really," shrugged Dil. "I was just wondering about my diet."

"Can I help?" Liana smiled down at him. "I _am_ a nurse, you know."

"Well… I was thinking maybe I should try to be a little healthier. What's good for pregnant women?"

"Pregnant women, huh? Well, the usual: a balanced diet, plenty of vitamins, those disgusting yogurt drinks that reduce your cholesterol…"

"Eww, rank," remarked Dil.

"I know," laughed Liana. "You just have to try and keep healthy and don't smoke or drink alcohol. All first-time mothers worry about that kind of thing. It's perfectly natural."

"Ah-ha," nodded Dil. "So… these tests. I don't suppose there are any pictures of the inside of my stomach?"

"I'm afraid not," Liana smiled apologetically, drawing to a halt at the entrance to the children's ward. "Look honey, there's your mother and Dr. Marsh. Go on now – I've got things to do."

Dil smiled gratefully at her and then wandered over to where Didi was talking to Dr. Marsh, whom he recognised from earlier in the day.

"Dil!" Didi exclaimed, throwing her arms around her son. "I only went to buy some magazines. Where did you go?"

"Just for a walk," Dil shrugged dismissively.

"Honestly." Didi rolled her eyes. "You kids never used to wander off like that. So Dr. Marsh, you were saying…?"

"We got it right first time," Dr. Marsh smiled patronisingly at Dil. "It was a reaction to those pills you were taking. I'd ask your son's psychologist for a more suitable prescription if I were you, Mrs. Pickles."

"Actually we want to try going without for a while," Didi smiled politely.

"Hmm… your choice. So Dil," Marsh went on. "How do you feel now?"

"Five-by-five, Doc."

"Well we'd still like to keep you in overnight just in case you have another reaction. If you still feel – uh – 'five-by-five' in the morning then you can go home. Does that sound ok?"

"Sounds cool."

"Can I stay too?" asked Didi, who still felt guiltily responsible for the whole thing.

"Of course, Mrs. Pickles," Dr. Marsh replied smilingly.

"You'd like me to stay with you, wouldn't you honey?" Did asked anxiously, looking at Dil.

"Sure I would," he grinned at her.

"Oh good," Didi sighed gratefully. "I bought you some comics to read before lights-out."

"You da man, Mom," Dil smiled serenely.

x x x

Dil was dreaming that he was back in the womb, swimming lazily around in a state of pure happiness and serenity. He had a wonderful feeling of being in total solitude, cut off entirely from the outside world.

Then suddenly he was plunged into darkness. He heard himself cry out, and in the next moment he was moving with absolutely no control, hurtling forward in some kind of… dinosaur? It looked like that old Reptar toy his father had lying around in the house. Angelica swore that one of the first things Dil did after he was born had been to escape with her and the other babies in that thing, but he never believed it.

And then he saw it again: that blinding light.

"Dil!"

Dil's eyes snapped open, and he found himself staring into the kindly face of the nurse Liana.

"Test results ok?" she whispered.

"Ah-ha…" yawned Dil, looking blearily around him for some way of telling the time.

"Your mom's asleep," Liana went on. "And it wouldn't be the first time one of her kids has sneaked away without her noticing."

"What do you mean?" Dil asked suspiciously.

"There's hardly anyone about and I know where they keep the ultrasound machine. You're outta here tomorrow, remember. Are you game?"

Dil stared at her, sure that he must still be dreaming. "You bet!" he exclaimed.

Still smiling, Liana waited patiently until Dil got out of bed and then started to lead him from the ward. Dil began to wake up a little as they walked. When he realised that he was barefoot he wondered why Liana was so much more lax about the slippers rule than every other member of the ward staff was. This was all very surreal, even for him, but he didn't feel like he was dreaming.

"Lie there," instructed Liana, deftly closing the door behind them and then pointing a finger at a plank-like bed. "And take your top off."

Dil was vaguely aware of stories he had heard on the news and cautionary tales about proper use of the Internet, but something besides Liana's kindly disposition compelled him to trust her, so he did as he was told. The room was dark, this obviously being a covert operation, but a few little lights became visible as the ultrasound machine started to boot up.

"This may feel a little cold," Liana said gently, suddenly producing what looked like a toothpaste tube and squeezing a generous amount of clear gel onto Dil's abdomen.

"Holy crap!" exclaimed Dil, his body tensing instinctively. "Jeez, you're like the dentist right before an operation: 'This may hurt a little…'"

"Sorry," Liana laughed freely.

She made herself comfortable in the swivel chair between Dil and the ultrasound machine. She had something in her hand that Dil thought looked like the offspring of a dust buster and a computer mouse, which she started to move gently over his gel-slicked abdomen.

"See?" she whispered, as a blobby purple image appeared on the screen.

"Yeah…" whispered Dil, squinting through the darkness at the lighted screen. He could see a small black dot clinging to the wall of his stomach. He supposed that to Liana it could be anything, but he just _knew_ it was his baby. "Hey, do you do this for every kid who wants to see inside his stomach?"

"Not many of them do. In fact you're the first."

"Couldn't this get you like fired or something?"

"Don't worry about that, sweetheart. You want a picture?"

"Yes please."

Liana pushed a button somewhere, and then suddenly she took the device away from Dil's stomach.

"I have to go soon," she told him. "I'll process your picture and then I'll take you back to the ward. There's some paper towels over there – go clean yourself up."

Dil obediently went and mopped the gel from his front, and when he returned to Liana she handed him a very indistinct picture of the inside of his stomach. Dil was happier with it than a lot of people probably would be with such a gift.

"Here we are," whispered Liana, lightly touching his cheek when they reached the children's ward. "Look at that – your mother's been sleeping like a baby. Now I really _do_ have to go. And don't worry – you'll be fine."

Dil held the ultrasound picture up to his face and squinted at it, but it was much too dark for him to see and he didn't want to risk taking it out into the lighted corridor. By this time Liana's words no longer surprised him. He looked up, wondering if he would in any way sense her retreating form, but of course he didn't. Feeling ten times better now, he crept back to his bed and pulled his hat out of his locker. He stuffed the picture into it, as he had absolutely no intention of letting anyone know of the photograph's existence. And then he settled down to sleep, his mind finally at ease.

x x x

Stu was tinkering with his latest invention in the basement when Didi and Dil got home. He emerged long enough to enquire after his son's health, but soon disappeared again. Didi heated up some ox-tail soup for Dil ("I just really feel like food with a body part in the name"), and then he went upstairs for a long soak in the bath, because you need to relax when you're pregnant more than ever. When Tommy arrived home Dil was in his pyjamas, towelling dry his frizzy red hair just outside his bedroom doorway.

"Hi Dil," Tommy smiled pleasantly. "How are you feeling?"

"Awesome. Those pills and all their evil side effects are history."

"Good. You look happier too."

"You got some new footage?" asked Dil, his eyes slipping down the video camera in Tommy's right hand.

"Totally," grinned Tommy. "Angelica was simpering around Sean and Savannah again today, and it gave me this idea for a movie about how kids' lives are a constant struggle to try and fit in."

"Yeah?" Dil asked interestedly. "And will the moral of the story be that we're all different, and it's ok to be yourself and fitting in means getting along with everyone?"

"Something like that," Tommy affirmed.

"Sounds deep."

"Of course."

x x x

Dil insisted that he felt up to going to school the next day. Didi wanted him to stay home, but Stu seemed to think it was some kind of compromise if he drove the boys to school rather than letting them take the bus.

"Sure you're ok?" he asked brightly, when they pulled up outside the school.

"Yeah Dad, I'm bitchin'," Dil insisted, grinning that quirky grin of his. "I'm totally over the three Ps."

"The three Ps?" queried Tommy, pausing halfway out of the car.

"Pills, puking and passing out," Dil elaborated. "All outta my system. I am ready to be released back into the community, T."

"That's great," smiled Tommy, as the two boys climbed out of the car. They stood and waved as their father drove away, and then they wandered into the schoolyard.

"Ah hey, there's Phil and the Chuck-man," Dil noticed, smiling and waving at their two approaching friends.

"You look better," remarked Chuckie. "How are you feeling?"

"I feel great," Dil replied chirpily. "Three Ps totally over and done with."

"Pills, puking and passing out," Tommy smiled dryly, catching his friends' blank expressions. "So anyway, Dil, these guys said they'd help me film a scene before classes. You wanna watch?"

"Uh…" Dil almost said yes, but suddenly his eye was caught by a strange green glow in the distance. He estimated that it was right at the back of the basketball court, and he felt suddenly compelled to go to it. "Sorry T, I gotta go take a whiz. Catch you at recess though, huh?"

"Sure," shrugged Tommy. "Whatever. Just don't lock yourself in, ok?"

"Why not?" Dil asked blankly.

"In case you have another funny turn in the toilet cubicle."

"Oh. Ok, Mom. Catch you guys later," and he waved cheerily at the three boys as he started to sprint away from them.

"Uh… is he gonna piss on the basketball court?" Phil asked guardedly.

x x x

The green glow faded and finally died out when Dil reached the back of the basketball court. He looked vaguely around him. The court was deserted and the chatter of the nearby kids had become a distant murmur of indistinct noise. Dil thought he felt movement inside him and panicked for a moment, instantly clutching his hand to his stomach. Then he smiled as it occurred to him that this was probably a good sign: the baby was becoming healthy again, and kicking him (or the alien equivalent – it might not even have legs) just to prove it.

Suddenly something caught Dil's eye. It was a small scrap of paper with one corner caught beneath a smooth brown stone. As it fluttered vainly in the breeze, Dil thought it looked like an animal trying to escape. He wandered over to it, crouched down and gently eased it out from under the stone.

" '_May eighteenth'_," he read aloud, realising that this must have come from some kind of diary. It offered no more information: just that date. To most people it would probably mean nothing, but Dil being Dil he had his suspicions.

Dil turned around again and almost jumped when he realised that the basketball court had suddenly filled with people. It was the junior high basketball team: the social elite – Sean and his cronies. They all stared at Dil for a moment, and then Sean leaned over and murmured something to a tall fair-haired boy with impressive biceps.

"Sean wants to know what you're doing here when we wanna practise," the blond kid reported.

"I'm not a mind-reader," shrugged Dil. "Or at least not to my knowledge. I didn't know you guys wanted to practise."

"Leave," Blondie ordered.

"Ok," shrugged Dil. He really didn't mind leaving – he had nothing to stay for now.

"Hey kid, wait," ordered Sean, just as Dil was about to step off the court. "Aren't you something to do with Angelica Pickles?"

"Sure," shrugged Dil. "She's my cousin."

"You were off school the last couple of days," Sean went on. "You had a bad reaction to your brain medicine."

"I know," Dil returned coolly. "I was there."

"Brain medicine?" queried a boy with Hispanic features. "Are you crazy or something, kid?"

"Sure he's crazy," another boy called out. "Just look at the way he's dressed."

Dil felt panic swell within him as he suddenly found himself surrounded by a dozen-odd tall twelve and thirteen year olds in vests and shorts, one of them holding a particularly heavy looking basketball. Dil looked desperately around him for a means of escape, but he was quite clearly trapped. Thoughts flashed through his mind in an instant: he wondered what they were going to do to him, although his primary concern was for his unborn alien.

Then Dil caught sight of something that ignited a faint spark of hope in him: a glimpse of blond hair and a designer red tank top. She quickly disappeared behind the onslaught of basketball players, but Dil knew that she had seen him. The hope dwindled as the advancing mob drew nearer. These were popular cute guys, some of them with six-packs, and one of them was _Sean_. It should come as no surprise by now that Angelica was shallow and selfish enough not to want to defend her dorky little cousin to…

"Hey guys. How's tricks?"

Dil was momentarily taken aback when the two boys closest to him were suddenly pushed apart like curtains to reveal the falsely smiling face of Angelica. Then suddenly her expression turned sour as she noticed Dil, apparently for the first time, and demanded, "What are you doing here, squirt?"

"Uh…" faltered Dil, "I was just…"

"Yeah, like I care," Angelica interrupted. "These guys need to practise so _scram_!"

Immeasurably thankful, Dil turned and ran, and he didn't stop running until he hurtled headfirst into Susie.

"Whoa, slow down, little Dil," she smiled, taking hold of his shoulders in an attempt to calm him. "What happened over there? I was just about to come over and rescue you."

"Thanks for the solid, Suse," Dil panted, still feeling slightly panicked, "but Angelica beat you to it."

"Well, it's what any decent human being would do," remarked Susie; "but as it's Angelica I'm surprised."

"Blood is thicker than water, my friend," Dil replied sagely.

"I guess so," Susie shrugged dismissively. "So how are you feeling?"

"Fine."

"Will you be ok getting to class?"

"Only one way to find out," asserted Dil, making for the school building. "See ya."

"Hey Dil!" Susie called after him. "If you get any more trouble from those guys just tell me, ok?"

"Oh yeah?" laughed Dil, turning to look at her. "What are you gonna do?"

"I'll think of something," grinned Susie. "And don't let them spoil your day."

"I hear ya!" He saluted her and then walked into school backwards.

x x x

When Dil got home from school, he immediately ran up to his room and made a note on the calendar he kept on his desk:

_May 18th  
Due date?_

He frowned at the scribbled note for a few moments, wondering if anyone would see it and, if they did, whether they would realise what it meant. The eighteenth of May was only about a week away. Dil suddenly felt very scared again. That didn't give him long to prepare for the birth of his baby. He didn't even know how its father expected it to survive on Earth without special breathing equipment or something.

"I sure hope you know what you're doing," Dil murmured to the open window.

"Dil?" Didi's voice cut sharply into his thoughts. "Who are you talking to?"

"Myself," Dil replied cautiously. That had to be better than aliens even _he_ didn't think were there, at least from her point of view.

"Oh…"

"I was doing weirder stuff than that before you made me see that doctor."

"I guess you were," Didi had to agree. "So did you feel ok at school today, honey?"

"I felt fine," Dil assured her. "Totally back to usual."

"That's good, sweetie."

She left, and Dil breathed out heavily. While she was standing in the doorway he had been very conscious of the note on his calendar. Quickly regaining his composure, he harshly yanked open a drawer and shoved the calendar inside. No one could know about this baby – not even Tommy.

Well… no one except Izzy, obviously.

To be continued… 


	3. Delivery

_All Grown Up: _**Keeping It In**

Part 3 

Susie had noticed how anxious Dil was to get home. She was worried, so she decided to bring it up with Angelica when they went to the Java Lava after school.

"Why was he being stared down by the entire basketball team?" demanded Susie. "I mean they're obviously a bunch of jerks, but they've never bothered Dil before."

"How should I know?" Angelica shrugged dismissively.

"You were there," countered Susie.

"I didn't hear a word they said."

"You didn't tell any of them about Dil's medication, did you?"

"Ok, maybe I mentioned it," Angelica relented. "Hey – don't look at me like that. Everyone saw what happened to Dil in the cafeteria – they were asking me what was wrong with him. I couldn't lie!"

"_You_ couldn't lie?" Susie asked incredulously. "When has _that _ever bothered you? Angelica, I hope you're not selling your cousin's psychological problems to Sean to make yourself seem interesting."

"Oh, like you're Miss Perfect," retorted Angelica.

"Listen," sighed Susie, "will you do me a favour? Don't tell anyone outside the circle about Dil's personal problems – or _any_ of our personal problems, come to that."

"But what if they ask?"

"Tell them it's none of their Goddamn business like the rest of us do! C'mon, Angelica – promise me!"

"Ok, ok, I promise," Angelica relented. "But if Sean goes off me as a result then _you're _responsible."

"How will I live with myself?" Susie muttered dryly.

x x x

The next morning Tommy went downstairs to find Dil in the kitchen, his back to the doorway as he stared thoughtfully at an open cupboard full of tins.

"What up, D?" Tommy asked guardedly.

"There's something weird going on," replied Dil, not turning round. "All of the tins are upside-down except for the noodle soup. You're not playing another one of your pranks on me, are you?"

"Dil, even if I wanted to prank you, I wouldn't do it at a time like this."

"A time like what? I'm better."

"Well… good."

"Noodle soup…" mused Dil. "What could it mean? Hey! Maybe I'm supposed to feed it to the… uh…" he tailed off, suddenly remembering his vow not to tell anyone about the baby.

"Or maybe Mom just put away all the tins upside-down except that one," Tommy suggested helpfully.

"T, you know as well as I do that this wouldn't be the first time aliens have left me signs," Dil returned soberly. "If there's noodle soup in the cafeteria today then I'm eating it."

"Way to go," Tommy said sarcastically.

x x x

Dil ate heartily at school that day, and for days afterwards. He could feel his baby growing inside him, clinging increasingly tightly to the wall of his stomach. He hoped that both he and the alien were getting enough nourishment. He didn't really doubt that the baby was healthy; it seemed to grow every day, and no matter how much Dil ate it didn't seem to satisfy his hunger.

"Dil?"

Dil looked up enquiringly from his noodle soup, smiling expectantly at his mother, who had said his name. It was Saturday morning. The family was sitting down to breakfast and the two dogs – Spike and his son Spiffy – were sniffing around the floor and quickly disposing of any crumbs that happened to fall their way.

"Just how much of that noodle soup have you eaten?" asked Didi, sounding surprised rather than angry. "I only bought it yesterday!"

"Yeah, well… I've just kinda had a craving," Dil laughed awkwardly.

"You _have_ been eating an awful lot lately," Stu cut in. "And I think you're putting on weight."

"So?" snapped Dil. "It's _my _body. I can put whatever I want in it."

"Not when it's _my_ money that's paying for it you can't," retorted Stu. "What's the matter with you anyway? Do you have an eating disorder or something?"

"No," Dil mumbled awkwardly, dreading the possibilities of where this interrogation might lead.

"Honey, are you sick again?" Didi asked kindly.

"I'm fine," shrugged Dil.

"You look pale too," remarked Didi. "Maybe we should take you to the doctor."

"What kind of doctor?" Dil demanded sharply.

"_The_ doctor," Didi replied calmly. "The one you normally go to when you're sick. And she's just going to look at you, ok? I'll see if I can make an appointment for this afternoon."

"Ah man…" grumbled Dil, as Didi picked up the phone and started to dial.

x x x

Didi did manage to schedule an appointment with the family GP for Dil that afternoon. Dil was still reluctant to go, but he knew he didn't have much choice so he didn't make a fuss. Just before Dil and Didi were about to leave, Tommy found his brother in his bedroom pulling on a tie-dyed red-and-yellow sweater.

"Are you _really _ok, Dil?" the older brother asked anxiously.

"Guess we're about to find out," shrugged Dil.

"I'm worried about you," Tommy persisted. "Ever since the whole thing with the psychiatrist and the pills it seems like you haven't been talking to me as much as you used to. You can still trust me, you know. Didn't I support you through that whole alien pregnancy thing?"

"Yeah," Dil admitted. "But you still thought I was crazy."

"So what if I did?" demanded Tommy. "That's just who you are. You've always been a little eccentric – it's never stopped me caring before."

"Sweet," remarked Dil.

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

Dil thought for a moment, and then nodded slowly. "Yes. If you want me to I'll tell you about it when I get home, but you have to promise me you'll keep it a secret from _everyone_, especially Mom and Dad."

"Of course I will," Tommy said at once.

"Solid," Dil approved. "Shouldn't be long, you dig?"

"Sure. See ya later."

"Word."

x x x

The oversized lolly stick pressing down on Dil's tongue was a little too close to his throat, and it was making him feel sick. He thought that he probably wouldn't throw up, but the possibility still worried him.

"Fine," remarked Dr. Williams, withdrawing the instrument and picking up the device she used to examine ears.

"Do you want me to take my clothes off?" Dil offered generously, as he felt the warmth from the doctor's torch on his left ear.

"Not today, thank you," Dr. Williams smiled weakly. She was never quite sure how to handle this particular patient.

"Why not?" demanded Dil. "You said you were gonna give me a full examination. I'm not embarrassed if you're not."

"Really," Dr. Williams insisted, moving around to the right ear and stooping to peer into it. "It won't be necessary."

"So am I ok?" Dil asked anxiously. May eighteenth was three days away, and he was getting extremely apprehensive about the birth of his baby.

"Physically you're fine," Dr. Williams replied, taking a seat opposite Dil. "But your mother is right to be concerned about your symptoms."

"What symptoms?" Dil wanted to know, replacing his purple-and-green-striped hat and pulling it down over his ears. "You mean the over-eating?"

"Yes," Dr. Williams said cautiously; "and she also mentioned that you've been a little _subdued_ lately."

"Subdued?" Dil pulled a face. "What does she mean by that?"

"Well apparently you haven't been talking much lately, and you've been avoiding questions, and you've seemed distracted. I wonder, Dil: have you been under any stress lately?"

"No more than usual," shrugged Dil. He was lying, of course: he was finding the pregnancy very stressful. But if he wasn't going to tell his own parents about it then he _certainly_ wasn't going to tell a doctor.

x x x

"Well?" demanded Tommy. He had been lying on his bed with his laptop balanced on his stomach, watching some scenes from the movie he was currently shooting; but he closed the lid of the computer and sat bolt upright when his brother wandered into the room.

"Dr. Williams thinks it's stress," reported Dil.

"And what is it really?" asked Tommy.

"You won't believe me," Dil lamented, sitting down on the bed beside Tommy.

"It doesn't matter what I believe. I just wanna know why you've been so spaced."

Dil took a deep breath and finally admitted, "I'm still pregnant, T. One of the babies survived."

"Oh." Tommy blinked at him. "Aren't you happy?"

"Yeah, I'm psyched!" Dil grinned ecstatically. "So far I think the aliens have told me that the baby's coming on Tuesday and until then I have to eat noodle soup to keep it healthy. And one of them came to me in the hospital disguised as a nurse and did an ultrasound scan on me. It's so beautiful, Tommy," he smiled proudly, suddenly adopting a dreamy expression.

"Uh… that's great," Tommy replied uncertainly.

"But I need more information!" Dil exclaimed. "Like how do I get through the birth? And what do I do with it _after_ the birth! I'm scared, Tommy. What if I can't look after it? And now I don't even feel like I can talk about it to anyone. Ever since Mom took me to that doctor I've realised it's not always a good idea to wear your heart on your sleeve. Hey – that'd be so cool!" he exclaimed, his eyes shining suddenly as he started to imagine how it would look _literally_ to wear his heart on his sleeve.

"Ah D," Tommy smiled sympathetically, putting an arm around his little brother's shoulders. "Mom said she was sorry about that."

"She'd still think I was crazy if I told her, though," Dil pointed out. "And that's not what she wants me to be."

"I actually think Mom went a little crazy back there," remarked Tommy. "You have to be what _you _wanna be – you know that better than anyone – and that's what Mom wants you to be too."

"She worries about how weird I am."

"Yeah… But it's not like you to keep stuff bottled up inside of you like this. And you know you can trust _me_ even if you don't wanna talk to anyone else. Promise me you'll always tell me if there's something on your mind."

"Ok," agreed Dil, smiling again. "I promise."

"Solid," Tommy smiled back. "So apart from psyched and scared, how do you feel?"

"Kinda weird," Dil confessed. "This pregnancy is taking a lot out of me. And look how fat my feet are!"

"Is there anything you need?" asked Tommy. "Noodle soup?"

Dil pulled a face. "Man, I am _so sick_ of noodle soup. I could use a soda, though."

"You got it, D."

When Tommy went downstairs, he found Didi earnestly reading a chapter in a well-worn hardback volume called _Beyond Lipschitz_.

"Mom," ventured Tommy. "What are you doing?"

"Huh? Oh – hi sweetie," Didi responded, not looking up from her book. "The doctor said that Dil might be suffering from stress. I wondered if this book had any ideas."

"Why should it?" asked Tommy. "It's a book. It doesn't know how Dil feels."

"You're right," sighed Didi, surprising her son when she snapped the book shut. "I just don't know what to do. If he doesn't tell me what's wrong how can I fix it?"

"Nothing's wrong with Dil," Tommy smiled reassuringly at her. "He _is_ still upset about all that stuff with the pills and the psychiatrist and everything, but he'll get over it. And in the meantime, what he needs right now is a soda."

"Did he tell you that?" asked Didi.

"Yep," Tommy affirmed.

"He seems to tell _you_ everything. Do you think he'd mind if I took it to him?"

"I think he'd like that, Mom."

x x x

Dil was performing handstands in the middle of Tommy's bedroom floor when Didi arrived with the soda.

"Hey Mom," he smiled, not bothering to invert his posture. "What up?"

"I brought you your soda," replied Didi.

"Solid," Dil approved, collapsing into a sitting position in order to accept the proffered can of cola. "Thanks, Mom."

"Honey," Didi ventured cautiously. "I really _am_ sorry about making you see that psychiatrist, you know."

"I know," Dil smiled blithely.

"Have… you forgiven me?"

"Totally."

"Only… well, you seem to have stopped telling me things since it happened."

"What did T tell you?" Dil suddenly demanded.

"Nothing," Didi said defensively. "But if you _did_ want to tell me something I'd listen. I'll never take you to another psychiatrist again – I promise!"

"I just don't understand why you did it, Mom," Dil confessed. "I thought it didn't matter to you that I see the world differently, and that you'd love me no matter what."

"I _do_ love you no matter what!" exclaimed Didi, horrified that Dil should think otherwise. "I was just worried you might hurt yourself."

"I would never do _that_," scoffed Dil. "Do you think I'm stupid or something?"

"Um… no."

"Look, Mom: I think the world is triangular, and I know that we're getting closer to our alien brethren every day, and not a whole lot people think I'm right. But one thing we all can agree on is that self-mutilation is way cheese."

"Ok, good," Didi smiled, actually feeling very reassured. "So… are you ok?"

"Bitchin'."

"Good."

Didi crouched down and hugged her son tightly, and was grateful to feel him return the embrace. Then she stood up and backed out of the room; when she turned round she met Tommy on the landing.

"Tommy," she murmured. "I think there's something he's not telling me. Do you think he didn't believe me when I said I wouldn't take him back to the psychiatrist?"

"Um…" Tommy didn't know at first what to say. "I think he just doesn't wanna worry you, Mom. And maybe he just needs a little space. You _are _kinda…"

"What?" demanded Didi.

"Well… you're kinda in-your-face. Or, more specifically, Dil's face. Just maybe take a step back and let him deal, ok?"

"Um… ok."

"You da man, Mom," smiled Tommy, making his way back to his room and to Dil.

x x x

Dil was a bag of nerves throughout Monday. The baby clinging to his stomach lining felt huge to him. At recess Phil found him in a toilet cubicle (he had carelessly left the door open) testing the size of his throat.

"Trying to make yourself barf?" Phil enquired politely.

"No," replied Dil, sounding slightly sick as he withdrew his fingers from his mouth and clutched his hand to his neck. "That's the last thing I want."

He kept reminding himself that he should be grateful for the fact that there was only one baby inside him. He felt guilty for thinking it, as the untimely death of his other eleven-odd children still hurt, but he couldn't even imagine how it must feel to excrete a dozen things this size from his throat. He vaguely wondered if this baby and the others might have been smaller if they'd had to share the available resources.

_Is it easier_, wondered Dil, _to puke up one large alien or twelve small ones?_

He made a note of the question in his alien log that evening. It was a small notebook filled with all of his previous alien encounters, from the first time he thought he saw a UFO to the false alarm with Tommy's sleep-stealing incident; to the time he'd been invited on board an alien vessel and then taken back in time one hour for an important appointment; the first inkling that he might be playing host to a litter of alien embryos right up to the latest stage of pregnancy.

_All signs indicate that the baby will be born tomorrow. I don't know what time, or where. I hope it isn't in the middle of class! Here's hoping the baby's native race will give me a few more clues before the little guy arrives. I don't have a clue what the baby will need once it's out of me. When it's in my body I can protect it, and I'm being totally careful not to let it get hurt after what happened to its brothers and sisters (hindsight is twenty-twenty, y'know?), but it scares me to think of what could happen to it after I've given birth. But I guess all first-time mothers feel that way._

Dil sat back against his pillows and re-read the entry. He realised that he was going to have to start hiding that thing if he didn't want to be sent to any more doctors.

x x x

On Tuesday morning Dil's alarm clock woke him up at six thirty as usual, but his watch didn't seem to agree about the time. It just kept flashing _15.00_ very insistently. Dil hit it a couple of times before abandoning the attempt when he realised just how much he needed to go to the bathroom. When he had relieved the pressure and woken up a bit, it occurred to him that his wristwatch might well be trying to tell him something.

Dil wandered over to the window, pulled it open and asked the brightening sky, "Three pm? Is that all I get?"

No further signs came to him, so Dil tried to forget his nervousness and went down to breakfast.

x x x

"Are you ok?" Kimi asked Dil at recess. "You seem kinda spaced."

"I'm fine," replied Dil.

He was sitting alone on one of the picnic benches, quietly panicking about the impending birth of his baby. Tommy, Chuckie, Phil, Lil and Susie were all nearby; Kimi had been with them before she noticed that Dil didn't look his usual cheerful self. She now got the distinct impression that he would like to be left alone, but she didn't want to leave him looking so glum.

Her dilemma was solved when Tommy came over. Kimi offered a small smile, said, "Ok then," and returned to her friends.

"They've been bombarding me with questions about you, D," reported Tommy, sitting down next to his brother. "You look really bummed. Isn't it today that the – uh – baby's coming?"

"I think so," Dil confirmed. "At three pm."

"That doesn't give you much time to get away from school."

"I'm already feeling a little queasy, T. I might have to leave before three. Do you the think the school nurse has any experience with childbirth?"

"Uh… doubt it. And I'm almost sure she's never delivered an alien baby."

"I'm scared, Tommy," Dil confided, in a small voice.

"Don't be scared," Tommy smiled consolingly, not quite believing that he was saying these things. "Imagine how happy you'll be when you're holding that little baby alien in your arms. You're gonna be a mom, D!" _Am I the best brother in the world or am I just crazy?_

"Yeah." At last Dil managed a small smile. "And I guess if the aliens thought I needed to know anything else they'd have told me, right?"

"Sure," Tommy agreed. "It probably just needs what any child needs: food, warmth and a lot of love and attention."

"And plenty of saltwater."

"Um… if you say so."

x x x

The fourth grade was in the middle of a spelling test at half past two, when the sickness Dil was feeling became almost unbearable. He was about to raise his hand and ask to be excused when his teacher noticed that he was grimacing and clutching his stomach. She gave him a hall pass and told him to go to the nurse's office. Once out of the classroom, Dil immediately went to the restroom and coughed a fair amount of blood and mucus into one of the toilets.

Suddenly he heard a familiar voice inside his head: "Dil."

"It's you!" Dil exclaimed, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Where are you? The baby's coming!"

"Are you ok?" asked the voice.

"I feel like I'm gonna die."

"Yeah, that'll happen during labour."

"You might have warned me before you got me pregnant," complained Dil.

"And our child?"

"I think it's ok. Where _are_ you?"

"I'm on the Mother Ship," the voice replied. "I don't think I can get to you in time, though. Where do human women give birth?"

"In this culture, usually the hospital," replied Dil. "That's where I was born. It's also where I went after I… uh… lost the other babies."

"And did Liana find you there?"

"Yeah. Was I right? Did you send her?"

"Of course. Go back to this 'hospital' and she'll be there to help you."

Dil cleaned himself up with a scrap of toilet paper, flushed everything away and then stumbled out of the cubicle. Sean was out there, staring at him as though he was regurgitating a baby alien at that very moment.

"Who were you talking to?" demanded Sean.

"Myself," returned Dil. "I have to go."

He barged past Sean, clutching his stomach as it was still killing him, and he almost collapsed out into the corridor. He was vaguely aware of a small crowd nearby as he sank to his knees, clutching at the wall for some kind of support.

"Is it supposed to be like this?" he croaked, but no answering voice came to him.

Dil could hear voices: Sean's, Savannah's, and several others he didn't recognise. Did that mean Angelica was somewhere nearby? It occurred to Dil that school must be over; it must be three o'clock. He felt like he was about to pass out, but then suddenly he felt hands on his chin and his face was lifted. He blinked a few times, a blurred image of his cousin forming in front of his eyes.

"Dil!" Angelica exclaimed urgently. "What's wrong with you?"

"Hospital…" Dil rasped pathetically.

"_Hospital_?" Angelica shrieked in panic.

"Dude, he's snapped," remarked Sean.

"Eww!" exclaimed Savannah, as Dil suddenly vomited violently onto Angelica's fifty-dollar designer platform shoes.

"_Don't just stand there_!" Angelica yelled desperately. "_He needs HELP! _Sean, here's my cell phone – call an ambulance!"

"Me?" Sean asked, in tones of alarm and panic.

"Oh for Christ's sake!" snapped Angelica, shoving the phone forcibly into his hands. "You dial _nine… one… one_," she recited slowly. "Ask for an _am-bu-lance_ and give them our _lo-ca-tion_. Got it?"

Utterly overwhelmed by the whole situation, Sean robotically did as he was told. Angelica returned her attention to her young cousin, who was clutching at his stomach and breathing heavily.

"Honestly, twerp," she murmured. "How many times am I gonna have to get you to a hospital, huh? Susie!" she exclaimed, suddenly catching sight of her friend's approach. "Thank God you're here. Dil's really sick."

"I can see that!" exclaimed Susie, visibly alarmed.

"Sean's called an ambulance. Can you go find Tommy? I'll stay with him."

Susie did as requested at once, and Tommy came to Dil's side at about the same time as the paramedics.

"Can I go with him?" Tommy asked the most senior looking paramedic breathlessly (he'd run all the way from his classroom). "I'm his brother."

"Sure," the man consented. "Can you give me a number for whoever looks after you guys?"

"That's ok," Angelica cut in. "I've called the kid's parents. They'll be on their way to the hospital right now."

x x x

For Dil, the next twenty minutes or so passed in a series of blurred images and indecipherable noises. He could still feel the baby struggling inside him. He knew that three o'clock had passed. He couldn't tell how long ago, but it concerned him that the aliens had got it wrong. Unless they had meant that three o'clock would be the time at which he would throw up more spectacularly than he had ever done in his life, in which case they were spot on. He wished that they'd told him how long it would be after that before he could expect the baby to come out.

When Dil finally regained all of his senses, he saw the welcome face of Liana smiling over him. He sighed with relief, though he still felt every muscle in his body tensing as his stomach contracted violently.

"Your parents and your brother are in the office with the doctor," Liana explained soothingly. "He's telling them he thinks you reacted badly to all that noodle soup. They're not far away, but I guess this is something they shouldn't see."

"Is it almost over?" Dil asked desperately.

"It'll just be a few more minutes," Liana said reassuringly. "And then you'll have a beautiful baby that you'll love more than anything, and it'll be worth every bit of discomfort."

"_Discomfort_?" Dil echoed scathingly. "Try _pain_! I take it you've never given birth?"

"No," Liana smiled apologetically. "Normally I'm not built for it. Ok, you might want to get onto your hands and knees."

She helped him to get into position, the tight feeling in his stomach and the occasional painful contraction inhibiting his movements a great deal. To his surprise and relief, Dil found that he actually did feel a little more comfortable on all fours. A slight groan escaped his lips as he felt a bulky shape forcing its way steadily up his oesophagus.

"Ok Dil," Liana said soothingly, gently rubbing his back through the hospital gown. "It'll all be over soon."

x x x

"There are a lot of artificial preservatives in that kind of soup, you know," Dr. Marsh said sternly. "Weren't you aware that Dylan had an allergy?"

"Obviously _not_," Tommy shot sarcastically at him.

"Tommy!" scolded Didi. Then she looked at the doctor and said, "We had no idea. But he's eaten that kind of soup before. Well… not in such vast quantities but… are you sure that's what it is?"

"Not positive, no," Dr. Marsh admitted. "It could be the lasting effects of those tablets that made him so ill before, but I doubt it. I think he just needs to – um – get rid of the last of it and then sleep it off. We'll examine him after that."

Apparently satisfied that he had said all he needed to, Dr. Marsh led Stu, Didi and Tommy back out into the private room to which Dil had been assigned in order to spare the other hospital patients the unpleasant sights and smells being expelled from his mouth at irregular intervals. They found him lying back on the bed, apparently exhausted, blood-spattered vomit embellishing his hospital gown.

"I'll – um – get a nurse to clean you up," offered Dr. Marsh, sidling away and disappearing out of the door.

"Honey, you're awake!" exclaimed Didi. "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine," Dil smiled serenely, looking strangely wistful. "I think it's all gone."

"Well that's a relief," remarked Stu. "I'll bet it _was_ all that soup you were eating. I told you not to - "

"Stu!" hissed Didi, elbowing her husband in the ribs.

"That's ok, Dad," murmured Dil, sounding peaceful and at the same time almost drunk. "I won't be needing any more soup from now on. Well… at least not for a while, I hope."

x x x

Tommy was bursting with curiosity when he finally got Dil on his own. They were concealed behind the curtain surrounding the bed, the younger brother climbing into his clothes while Stu and Didi were back in Dr. Marsh's office listening to a lecture about the appropriate doses of noodle soup for nine-year-old boys.

"So what happened?" asked Tommy.

"It's a girl," Dil replied dreamily. "She's so beautiful, Tommy! I've never seen anything more wonderful in my life!"

"Um… that's great," Tommy smiled weakly, wondering not for the first time whether he should worry more about his brother than he did. "So… where is it?"

"She's safe. Liana – that's my midwife – she took her. She's gonna feed her up and give her a saltwater bath, and then she's gonna bring her to our place in time for when the father arrives on the Mother Ship."

"Really?" Tommy asked incredulously, wondering just where all that had come from.

"Mhm," Dil nodded, smiling. "I know you don't really believe it, T, but… I've never been happier."

"That's great, D. I'm happy for you," Tommy said truthfully. "So… are you gonna be a bit more cheerful after this?"

"Totally," Dil grinned crookedly. "You have no idea how scared I was. But now that I've done it and I know the aliens are gonna help me look after her, I feel great! And no more pregnancy problems either."

"So let me get this straight," said Tommy. "While Mom and Dad and I were in there with that doctor being lectured about the dangers of noodle soup, you were out here with an alien midwife giving birth?"

"That's about it," Dil agreed.

Tommy smiled to himself as he drew aside the curtain while Dil pulled on his hat. Tommy had always admired his brother's individuality, which he saw as a good thing rather than the alarming descent into madness that some people seemed to perceive it as.

"There're Mom and Dad," announced Tommy, as Stu and Didi emerged from the doctor's office. "Ready to go?"

Dil nodded efficiently, tugging at the drawstring on his hat to tighten it, and smiled blithely, "Always."

THE END


End file.
